I was in my proper years in my dentistry by that time. Then grains of my tears started to fall. I don't know how can I handle a sudden twist in my life.  What I am afraid for is leaving my friends behind. And what will I become to the new environment I will be. 

       When I got there I lived in a dorm with beautiful ladies. The first year of my stay was good.You know a lot of things can happen. In my second year was my roller coaster year.  It's like I take the way to the back streets. That year I met someone who becomes my world now. But things wouldn't be as smooth as an ice. I earn my bachelor of science major in biology, a preparatory course for Medicine. There's this National medical admission test in which I fail to pass. I admit that I failed to prepare properly for the exams so I also failed to proceed to my proper years in medicine. When I graduated I got separated with him. Well that's life.

         In the province, I worked as a pharmacy assistant. It was really hard especially when you set your mind onto something. It's hard how to change the the way you live your life you have used to. It was very difficult for me to adjust. I study how to live my life. Because seriously I don't even know how. I thought I was going to be a doctor. But in just one failure everything is taken back away from you. 

        A year had passed after I graduated. Someone told me that my parents were planning to send me to school again. I have that drop of hope that they will enroll me again in dentistry since it is cheaper than medicine. Then one day, my mother called to the phone and ask me if I want to teach. I was like "what? ", but I told them that what ever the decision will be, it's fine with me. But of course it is the other way around.  I always told my parents that I will never ever want to teach. Shaking my head is an automatic answer when someone ask me if I can teach. But look, that is where my road is leading me for now. You really don't know how life will play you right? It is very ironic. But I always look at the brighter side. I'm just enjoying what is serve in my face right now. 

        There are late nights when I feel like I reach nothing. I feel like they will laugh at me because i will end up teaching and not as a dentist or as a doctor. So I hid from everyone. I deactivated my social media accounts and text no one. Its like I live under a rock and no one notice my absence because I am forgotten.

One day my mother told me to get some supplies from our supplier. When I got there, there's a clique of dentistry students. I looked at them with envy. Because I want to be also like them but I am here, with nothing, can't do anything to support myself. 

 

        I really don't know when this road I'm walking is leading me. But in the back of my head there is my burning desire to become a dentist because that's what I want to be. At the end of the day, it is my life. Its my "life"not theirs. That is the thought I am holding onto. No matter what will happen it is in my hand how to achieve my dream. Maybe it's not my time yet,  I just hope to reach my dreams soon :)